If there is one thing I cannot stand, it’s rude people. More often than not, if you give me attitude or do something outright disrespectful, I will try to make you feel bad about your behavior. By the way, this is an art. My ultimate goal is to have rude people apologize for their actions/attitude without me bullying them into it. If I fail to constructively convince you that you were mean, I will go home and stir about it all night and think about the “what-ifs” and “I should have said this…or that.”
In my opinion, pregnant women will behave similar to when they are PMS’ing and, let me tell you, I take prozac for my PMS. Before medication, I was once honked at and given the bird for making a left turn at a stop sign (guess it wasn’t my turn). I cried…hysterically. That is not a normal reaction for me.
I remember back in 1994, as a high schooler, I once called my mom at 7:30 in the morning to scream at her about using the last of the hairspray. “Jen, you must be on your period.” “Yes!!!” I wailed like a…well, like a seal actually…yeah, I wailed like a freakin’ sick, beached seal. So, imagine me in 2006, pregnant and no medication. Holy shit IS RIGHT.
I like to call the following story “Grocery Store Blowout #1.”
It was a few days before Halloween and I took it upon myself to go to Fry’s Superstore and purchase not one, not two, but THREE pumpkins. Did I mention I was by myself and pregnant? I was beginning to get a little irritated with people intruding upon my personal space in line, however, Halloween was near and I was excited to carve an angry devil face into my jack-o-lantern to let off some steam.
I pushed my cart toward my ugly Pontiac Aztek (worst car ever). As I heaved the final pumkin into the trunk, I noticed three adults putting their groceries away into the car just beside me. They saw me. They saw my pumpkins. They saw I was pregnant. I smiled. You might even say I glowed.
I looked around to see where I could stash my cart, and couldn’t even find a curb. So, I did the right thing and returned the cart to the fron of the store (not too far). When I returned, as if by magic, there was an empty grocery cart sitting right behind my car. “What?” my confusion quickly turned into fury when the woman started the car. I probably should mention now that these three adults amounted to six adults, and I could care less. I KNEW I could take ‘em…all SIX OF ‘EM. I approached their window, threw up my arms and yelled “What THE FUCK?!!!” When they showed how puzzled they were, I pointed to the cart, pointed at them, pointed at my belly, and gave them some more choice words.
They backed up and I threw their cart into their newly-empty parking space. What I wanted to do was punch them all in the faces and make them apologize, but I am so glad they did not get out of their car. Nope, instead, they laughed at me in unison. Every single one of them thought I was hilarious and didn’t care that they were the rudest people ever. I cried for about an hour after that. It began instantaneously with their antagonistic laughs.
I look back and think about what I could have done differently. Think about it, I’ve been stirring on this since 2006! I could have put the cart behind their car, right? But truthfully, I should have left it all alone. Or maybe there is a special way to approach jerks like this.
Man or woman, preganant or not, what would you have done?